he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
He kept coming back from the bar with hotter girls and just left with two...I feel like I just witnessed something amaZing. Like meeting Jesus and finding out he has no morals either
I was too sleepy and drunk to verbally annihilate anyone and ruin their reason for being. So i just opted to sleep with the fitted sheet on the floor
Just remember my house smells of thick cut bacon and I have a big dick.
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
Plus i lost a button on my shirt and we got free drinks all night. Sorry I'm not sorry.
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
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