Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
Um, that's called prostitution
Not if I leave it on the nightstand, then it's called cab money
I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
So for Valentine's Day...I finally swallowed. I feel like I earned that steak.
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
I was about to take him home and fuck his brains out but then the police came and arrested him for the stolen credit card he had been buying me drinks with all night...
MILK DIDN'T HELP. IT'S NOT HELPING
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
Randomize
