You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
Found: medium sized pair of mens pants tucked inside my purse w/ a dry cleaners coupon in left pocket. Call if you wish to claim the coupon
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
I didn't ride the struggle bus so much as drive it backwards off a cliff.
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
I'm gonna let my dick speak for itself from now on. Seriously, it's always recruiting for me even after 6 hours of drinking.
I needed that adderall to break my tradition of passing out at the bar on Sundays
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
I think I died and satan has brought me back to life and I'm paying for my sins with this hangover
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
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