sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
What type of outfit says "I know you slept with my boyfriend before and are also way skinnier than me, but I look better...somehow"
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
Stolen hampster on my tits. Don't tell me I don't know how to party.
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
Please note: when a bouncer tells you to leave, pointing out that their career path makes them a much better judge what to do will not make you friends
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
Maybe don't sell him so much adderall next time. The other day during finals he was convinced that he could see the "molecules of life in the air" and kept reaching up slowly to grab them.
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
Randomize
