So the D.A.R.E. essay I helped my tutor kid write won an award. Oh the irony.
let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
Is it awkward to ask someone I've slept with to officiate my wedding?
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
So I had a crappy evening so the fat girl in me says eat and cry and watch something sad. The cool girl in me says don't eat go run. So I'm watching family guy and doing crunches w a pickle in my mouth
Gross
AN ACTUAL PICKLE
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
Naked chocolate chip pancake making. I just spilled mix all over the place. My boobs are covered in flour. This is not going well.
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
Statistics show that guys with slightly higher IQ scores and overly-trimmed eyebrows have micro penises. It's science.
Randomize
