This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
You came back with puke all over your sweatshirt and started doing darth vader impressions
My last google search last night was 'vodka swimming pool'.
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
Couldn't get it up. She asked me what she was doing wrong. Didn't have the heart to tell her. I appreciated her willingness to adapt, but she's pretty much gonna look that bad her whole life.
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
Tell her to buy some booze and drink away her sorrows like an adult.
Can we just discuss how hundreds of miles away we were both beyond drunk and in some boys bed. That is the definition of friendship.
Either I'm too drunk or she gave me a hand job to the rhythm of jingle bells.
I just sat in the bathtub with the shower running so I could eat the whole box of mega stuffed Oreos. What am I doing with my life
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
Randomize
