Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
WTF?! TAYLOR SWIFT JUST WON ARTIST OF THE YEAR OVER MICHAEL JACKSON?! WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TO?!
i just realized the only form of arm exercise i get is holding my arms up in the stand up tanning booth
This guy in church just had a prayer request to help him get through his hangover. He is my new hero.
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
Did you know that taking off a bra with teeth burns ninty calories?
I found an industrial strength sharpie in the drawer so I started writing BONER JAM 2014 on everyone's foreheads so they kicked me out
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
She looked like a cross between Jesus and John Lennon. So I fucked her. I feel majestic and powerful.
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
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