Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
we were all standing in the kitchen taking shots and we look over at you and your face is in the plate of spaghetti you were eating.
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
He puked, did more shots, and then pissed in a drawer. We thought it was bad enough and all of a sudden...boom-clothes come off and he passes out with slippers and a styrofoam hat on and a guitar hero guitar in hand pretending he was slash.
I have no idea why I said that. I have no idea why anything happened last night, I broke my toaster making a egg. I'm going to quit drinking.
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
How was I supposed to know the accent was fake before i slept with him
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