I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
i think i have two assholes
i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.
gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
Of course it was necessary for me to call the strip club and ask what their shower policy is. Smelled like she was wiping her ass with my eyebrows during that dollar dance.
Dude, I had to stop mid fuck. Her cat was swatting at my balls as I did her from behind. I couldve lost something.
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
I was at the pharmacy picking up my herpes medication and the pharmacist asked if I had any questions about my medicine, looked at the bottle, and laughed. Insult to injury man.
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
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