Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
I'm going to write a book about John. It's going to be called big dreams, little dick
sitting next to michael phelps in the airport. wonder if he's carrying...
20 yrs from now I just want to barge in her house and yell at her kids, "I took ur moms virginity!"
let's get her a shirt that says "i went to key west for spring break and all i got was this illegitimate child."
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
She just came to my house, with puke in her hair, to wake up my dad and scream "happy fathers day you DILF!" at the top of her lungs
we had a ceremony where you passed your fake id onto me in the middle of the bar. i was on my knees and you presented it to me. i don't think the bartenders were suspicious though
Jake and I will do a protection ritual for ur dick I don't know where she has been
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
Randomize
