i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
so, give him that "thank you for fighting for my freedom bj" & he wont even remember what you said in that six min voice mail.
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
Just turned down sex because it's a holy day of obligation, my mom would be proud.
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
He rubbed my back afterwards. I forgot how to talk and I legitimately thought I was a cat for a few minutes.
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
He carried around a bottle of jäger the whole night and when everyone thought the cops came, he started doing push ups in the middle of the floor cause he said it calmed him down.
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
Randomize
