There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
She definitely pulled a diaper out of her purse and cleaned up the vodka with it, where do you meet these people?!
Just had the weirdest flashback. Did we buy melon, take it into the restaurant and try to make them give it to us as dessert?
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
I knew things were bad when I walked in on you feeding juice to your iPhone
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
You still owe me a blowjob for knowing more about hurricanes than you.
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
On another note, I kinda only wanna poop laying down now
This is either going to be a hilarious catfish or the fuck trophy of the century.
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