I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
Baconater + red wine = first meal of the day
Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
He told me he felt the only proper thing to do was fuck me to the top of the corporate ladder
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
omg girl... i cut your hair last night. tell me it looks okay!? i saw hair on the counter and i said ohhh nooo
Randomize
