omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
Get the fuck buddy a birthday present or not? He def deserves one, but how do I explain the debit card charge to my husband?
He gave me a promise ring. He promised that he will imagine me as every girl he fucks in college.
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
I don't know the quality of the hand jobs you've received in the past but it CLEARLY was not one from me
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
I got a text saying, "It's so great to throw tomatoes at seagulls."
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
Let’s not dwell on the negatives. I have a fat ass and suck dick well.
I thought I was drunk because I kept grabbing his arm instead of his dick
But then I realized it wasn’t his arm and that I was very lucky
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