I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
I don't remember her name, all I remember is trying to suck the wedding ring off her finger.
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
Yeah then she waddled like a duck in silence sat down and ate the entire paper towel roll.
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
well his attempt to make a white russian with instant coffee, gone off milk, and that weird probably illegal vodka we bought the other day isnt going well
Did we really just set fireworks off in a cemetery? Or was that a dream?
I think so and I think we were sober.
No ambien sex tonight. I just ate two hotdogs with chilli and onions.
Like the friend zone has no room for winks
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
It may be a clusterfuck, but I'll be looking classy as shit as I watch the nightmare unfold
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
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