i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
she went home with me because she said i reminded her of paul rudd. remind me to thank him for his awkwardness
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
A white limo full of drunken 30 something business people pulls up next to me and asks if they can kidnap me until 1030. If I don't make it back tonight, call someone and tell them I died gloriously
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
Drinking Patron always ends with me puking or receiving anal. So make your move when I start ordering it.
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
Randomize
