If I could text you the sound of me vomming, I would.
He called me "the Joe Montana of blowies." Not sure if that is an accomplishment or an insult, but going off of the amount of condensation on the windows of my car, I'm gonna just do a little touchdown dance and pass out.
I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
I think you threw up on me last night but i can't remember so i'm not mad at you.
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
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