honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
Last night I broke through a door, was hospitialized, arrested, and threw my shoe at a bouncer. This summer is gonna be fuckin sick.
you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
Responsibility: Hiding your beer when your DWI clients who are out on bond come to talk to you at bars.
Didn't get the job. Searched for my references on FB and saw the pic of me weighing my head passed out.
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
Lost feeling in my face, my shoe and had a nose bleed. That's not wings. Fuck red bull.
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
i just has to use a gift card to Target that one of my students parents got me to buy Plan B bc my bank account is -$0.08 so my 2017 is starting exactly how i pictured.
He just said "I can't wait to penetrate you tomorrow" I sat in silence for a second...he attempted to save it by saying "I can't wait to enter you".
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
Randomize
