you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
Changed my sheets. Found a can of rockstar, crushed bag of tostitos, used tissues, and enough of both of our clothes to make a whole outfit.
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
Meet me at the corner of "what the fuck" and"how'd you get in my bed" in 10 minutes.
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
I asked for a steak knife but the waitress could see in my eyes it was a bad idea
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
Convinced if I was being murdered in my house no one would come and save me. If no one heard my 10000000 orgasms last night, there is no hope.
The ass gains better be worth it
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