I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
dude you made out with his girlfriend and stole his credit card to buy more drinks
well when you put it that way, I sound like a terrible person
I never thought I'd hear the words "aww you pulled out" and "you're so sweet" in the same sentence.
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
University has ruined us all. I just had to clarify the last time I had sex as "No, not at the party we crawled home from in the snow. It was the one where you puked off the balcony and hit the barbecue."
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
Tell me why i'm looking through my medical records and the last thing it said about my labor was 'vagina was explored'!?
Randomize
