Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
The second he texted me with "*dry humps you!*" I knew any relationship we might have had was over.
Never have I ever before welcomed her period with such enthusiasm. She was starting to pick out baby names. She got me "What to Expect When You're Expecting."
Can we comment on the fact that at five thirty this morning, security woke me up in the hotel lobby, in my underwear, and some random guys winter coat?
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
He jacked off on my pillow when he found out I left. It was like coming home and finding that your dog, with separation anxiety, had pooped in your shoes. I think I'm flattered...
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
Randomize
