"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
if i get the "i'm engaged" text one more time, i'm going to shoot myself in the face so my cats won't eat it when i die alone.
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
So I feel like I should have had a going away party for your dick. Complete with balloons and cake. Yeahh that's right. I'm gonna miss it.
The cab driver gave me a church card yesterday and said I should reconnect with god.
Then he gave me 2 tickets to a movie he's going to be in
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
It would be awesome if I knew whose teeth these were in my pocket
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
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