You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
i left the bar a little after you and ended up flipping my car in the arbys drive thru
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
you just kept bragging about how there was a "pretty large" chance that you had pooped on the same toilet as George Clooney
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
I just brushed my teeth. In the car. With watered down Sprite. From Saturday. Multi-tasking at its finest.
Bad idea to be in a car concussed. I just described his dick as an elevator. I think i meant escalator, i dont know
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
I either forgot underwear this morning or lost them at work and I seriously don't know which.
I just ordered a onesie on amazon in the back of the ambulance while my patient was sleeping. I'm an adult
Girl... I just woke up with a bloody mary in a to go cup on my nightstand and two hours late for work.. I'm sorry i can't go out on weekdays anymore. Luckily my boss was just happy i was ok
I woke up this morning to find myself laying in a beer puddle with "I'm sorry" written on the shaft of my dick and Nicole was nowhere to be found. Gotta love her
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
He thought it would be sexy if he found my clothes and dressed me, and it was..until he found a thong under his bed and assumed it was mine. It wasn't
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