The guy I was getting with last night took off his purity ring mid-sex and threw it across the room.
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
He thinks that since we have been dating six months, that he can do the helicopter with his penis. Not okay.
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
The cops showed up and one of them got pushed in the pool. When he got out he looked really sad so I got him a towel and hugged him. He arrested all the underage drunkards but me.
I'm eating cheerios out of the palm of my hand while I pee with the door open. Is this adulthood?
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
I am eating croutons on my bathroom floor. Are you happy?!
Randomize
