what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
last night i found out that my 11 year old cousin used me as an example of what not to do in her D.A.R.E. speech. awesome.
He says he quit drinking. I'd like to have a moment of silence for losing the best drunken hookup ever. We will build a memorial to his awesome cock.
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
Also, fighting a very strong urge to nickname your dick Whitey Bulger, at least for today.
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety
And then you two got up and shouted in near perfect unison "I'M ALWAYS A SLUT FOR BASKIN ROBBINS" The bar just looked at us horrified.
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
Wait you took his virginity AND broke his bed doing it
I know! I’m the best!
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