dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
I'm so high that a hulu ad convinced me to go on healthybaby.com
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
I bought a dress specifically for face plant durability... this is how serious I am about my drunk status this weekend
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
Why is the clock ticking so loud? Now I know how Captain Hook feels.
Cleaning my room at 2am, in just one corner I found six beers, half a pint of whiskey, my flask, 2 shotgun bullets, my crown and shimmer lotion.
I just took three of the most beautiful hits of my life. As elegant and smooth and delicate and graceful as figure skating
I don't know whether to be insulted or flattered that I am being propositioned to have a threesome only if I wear my cat onesie
Exactly man. Who needs doctors when you have vodka and hot knives.
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
My boss asked me what was wrong today and I really wanted to tell her I woke up too late to smoke a bowl before coming in
Let me guess you did your hair instead? Has anyone told you about priorities?
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