Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
When She took off her bra.... A tube of lipgloss, her phone, I.D. And a wad of twenties fell out.... I'm officially no longer a butt man
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
Got to the gym, getting changed, found a jello shot in my shoes.
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
come home. i made deep-fried hotdogs; don't let me die alone.
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
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