Hey dude. Went to the hospital. Call me when you get up
You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
I think I'm going to start texting all the people that don't want to talk to me
There's a paramedic out here, what have you done?
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
woke with Taco Bell next to me in bed and people's shoe sizes written on my arm.
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
Woo is fucking right, dude. Vodka night tonight. Honestly, every night pretty much seeems like vodka night lately. My liver wants to move out of my body like I gave it an eviction notice.
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
Randomize