it only takes four glasses of wine for me to ride an elephant with a stranger.
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
why didn't you say something constructive like "stop chugging that vodka"?
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
We were having margaritas and I was saying "back when I was drinking..." They looked all confused. Then I realized "holy shit they think THIS is drinking?"
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
Randomize
