scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
Just took a closer look at the paper that kid wrote me his number on. It was an ATM receipt. His balance is $17.89. i made the right choice.
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
i wear a size 32DD bra. its basically impossible for me to get a speeding ticket
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
I will show up on your front porch in a wet t shirt and some mac and cheese
Ugh. The fucking vaginal recession is so real right now.
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
our moms work together...I can just see the conversation now, hey your daughter ruined my sons marriage, that's probably how it will start.
Can I come kidnap you from work so we can chug mimosas? My little brother has a ski mask I can borrow.
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
Randomize
