So ps i'm not pregnant with any athletes illegitimate children : )
Something growled at me in your dark backyard last nt. Hoping it was my landwalking laser sharks and not Andy.
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
then he compared my vagina to a dishwasher. A DISHWASHER?!
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
Get your dick back in here. On Saturdays, you're not allowed to leave my bed unless it's to make me bacon or coffee.
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