She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
Dear slutty diary: I lied about feeling guilty of being a homewrecker in order to have more sex. it worked.
The bar tenders gave me the number for a "taxi"... It's just a dude with a van. In retrospect, pretty sketchy. Robert was cool though.
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
Do you think dominoes pizza would deliver faster if I told them I just had shower sex and that always makes me hungry?
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
You've slept with someone mentioned in the NY Times, that officially makes you the most famous person I know.
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
You carved your initals into all my vitamins and said "now a small part of me will be in you every morning" before you fell asleep with my thong on your head.
Shut up. I hate you. We're doing shots tomorrow. Fuck the consequences.
Randomize
