Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
just looked in the mirror, I fell asleep with a face mask on. At least drunk me cares that much about the condition of my skin
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
Hey, you remember years ago when you told me you would give me a kidney?
I spent the whole ride asking the cabbie if people ever have sex back there, and if he wanted me to make that number one higher.
Far too many of our conversations end in us talking about sperm
Btw, remind me to tell you about how I had to cancel my crazy wild sex plans with Will b/c my roommate came back from his trip after a day b/c Canada wouldn't let him in. Fucking cockblock.
Actually that's the whole story. You don't have to remind me.
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
While buying Plan B the lady at the counter looked at me and said hope you have a successful night as I walked away in shame
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
Randomize
