Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
Im drinkin out of a coconut! I think im gonna dip my balls in it!
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
He was having an allergic reaction to that new brand of vodka Eric brought, so he just started chasing with benadryl.. Talk about commitment.
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
When the cab driver starts laughing its a good indication of the standard of girls you are bringing home
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
My ex boyfriend literally just asked "who needs porn?". This is EXACTLY why I dumped his ass.
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
Randomize
