I've spent the last three hours watching 30 rock and eating marshmallows and ham. I'm considering taking up weed to justify my lifestyle.
I woke up and someone had put toast at my feet. I was SO. HAPPY.
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
Also, beer. Big fan.
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
Somehow I don't think offering me edibles is what dad meant by checking in on me
They're the hard candy kind!
Randomize
