It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
She's like the Oprah of therapy. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. WITH A PADDED ROOOOM
I'm drunk from drinking bourbon out of a "cupcake sippy cup" at the Denny's bar. What the fuck happened to the goals I had?
You're breaking my sexual little heart
... and this time i WILL NOT make out with anyone dressed as batman.
When my parents ask, do you think "he was the cop I gave head to in order to get out of a speeding ticket" will suffice as to how we met?
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
Randomize