Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
New brilliant plan: invite two random okcupid girls to the same bar at the same time, have them compete
I know it must have been a hard break up. Are you okay?
Oh yeah, I'm fine dude. My vaginas heart is broken though. I feel bad for her, you should give her a call sometime.
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
All I found in my purse this morning was 160 cigarettes and a fistful of confetti.
If I had a vagina, my apartment would have been the Atlantic
sometimes a perk of being a drug dealer is amazon gift cards. who knew?
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
Randomize
