i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
You know you have a great job when you need a DD home from work at 6pm.
I was still in a towel. We hadn't even started drinking yet and the champagne bottle dropped and exploded literally up into my vagina.
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
Small children cheering my name. I am not a decent enough human being to feel comfortable with this.
he's singing something in russian and knocking over my plants with his dick, get his drunk ass out of my apartment
HE STUCK IT IN THE FISHBOWL WTF
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
I'm at the gym. I've taken enough caffeine to feel inspired to be a low budget instagram fitness model. I totally forgot my push up bra though
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
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