I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
When i tried to give you something that wasn't tequila...like water....you kept saying it was against your religion.
I've always been the spiritual type.
im flying all the way to minnesota to see him for four days... cutest-best-friend-reunion or most-epic-booty-call-ever?
who says it cant be both...
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
did you really just send me an instagramed dick pic?
Dude. I realize why I got sick. 8 shots three beers in an hour. Plus I ate an expired lunchable earlier.
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
David pulled a magic mike again and started stripping on every street sign we passed.
My brother slept till 4, bought a sword, got drunk and sharpened said sword. I went to corporate compliance training. Life is not fair.
my talents include tricking people into giving me money and free drugs
I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
Randomize
