I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
did we hook up?
no, because you kept repeating "itty bitty titties" when i took off my shirt
She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
Thanks to her sunglasses tan, I can't look at her when she blows me cause it's like getting blown by a raccoon. A very talented raccoon
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
ecstacy + fleshlight = not all that upset about being newly single anymore
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
He saw one of my bras on the floor and said "damn you could eat soup out of this"
Ok because I want to set a new world record for how fast I can drink away my Christmas money
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
I will most likely miss you the least and fondly remember you as Mr. "I need a minute" but really need 24 hours and 4 extra inches.
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
Randomize
