it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
I feel fat after drinking my meal replacement shake.
I added chocolate sauce, a bsg of m&ms and a crushed up brownie to make it taste better.
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
you kept spraying the cat with water and then telling it to "man up" when it cried
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
So like, boobs.
are you really going to start every conversation like that?
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
Randomize
