You dirty dirty liar I like the way you twitter
508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
Also I hooked up with a trainer at my gym. Between her, the married chick, and the bartender, my life is becoming a bad porn plot.
I found you laying in the kitchen with a bottle of vodka and a slice of bologna on your face. You said you were having a spa day.
Aaaaand then she sang MDMA to the tune of the YMCA song, with appropriate gestures.
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
Favor? Can you not wear as much glitter on your face this time? Walking in the house looking like a disco ball was enough embarrassment for the week 😒
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
Let this be a lesson to you, parmesan cheese crumbles are not a good substitute for coffee creamer, no matter how high you are
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
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