When I went to court, my judge's name was Honorable Ball. I couldn't stop laughing.
that probably didn't help your case.
I CAN MOONWALK!
Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
If I banged a coworker last night but didn't enjoy it can I put it down on my timesheet?
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
Nothing is more confusing than dreaming about being chased by jets, then waking up with an erection.
He eats kale on the regular. Do I look like a bitch that wants to eat kale. No. Give me some Boston market.
Randomize
