So we stole all of the newspapers out of the stands within a 1 mile radius and filled up her car with crumpled newspaper.
Who leaves their car unlocked at night?
Someone who wants to read the newspaper.
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
I told you I was good to drive
dumbass I drove... you sat in the passengers seat and steered with a paper plate
...Then she just started hitting me with a loaf of bread.
some bitch filled my sink with salsa.
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
I am going to tweet NASA until they put me into space
Those rocketship riding assholes need the common man
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
Terrible idea I love it
They want a bedroom just for their cats. And you thought we were gay.
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