super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
Her directions to the house party: "the north star will guide you, turn left. I'm wearing the potato hat"
she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know?
I left myself a trail of jello shots, that ended at his door. OR maybe he left me a trail of jello shots at his door. DO I GO IN!?
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
and then you called me a third time and yelled that you were stealing a puppy named Willow
HahahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHA MY LIFE IS A CAUTIONARY TALE
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
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