Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
We need to get cat food
Nevermind, the cat will eat lucky charms
im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
Its weird to pet your cat with a boner
What the fuck?
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
My mom just said we needed to put weed into our earthquake kit.
Rubbed one out while on hold to buy tickets to Disneyland. Feel simultaneously like a freak and strangely productive.
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
Besides he said his dick was as big as a loaf of bread and that it was broken. So I was like u have half a head of hair and a broken dick that looks like bread. No thanks. Im good.
But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups.
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
She kept telling me that it pissed her off that i expect people to make out with me...then she made out with me. Win?
Randomize
