PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
We need to talk about our relationship.
I just won a bet involving 10 tequila shots. You've got about 3 minutes
i'm gonna need a rally to restore sobriety after this weekend...
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
i was beyond wasted so he tucked me into bed and wrapped the blankets around me like a burrito. then gave me a bloody mary and an omlet when i woke up. and who says living with your cousin is a bad thing?!
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
If you don't let me come over I'm gonna call you on speaker and you have to listen to her scream and moan too
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
Just bought a gingerbread house kit and pregnancy tests. Happy holidays.
Randomize
