out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
Im in a bar and I just invented a scrabble drinking game. People are cheering. It's like the universe has aligned itself.
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
Liar. My heart is broken and my boobs are disappointed.
Don't tell him that you hope he dies in a boring missionary position with his wife. That doesn't go over well.
Randomize
