the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
My grandmother just called to say she disowned me. Apparently I uploaded a video to Youtube of me dancing nude with a blow-up doll named Dorothy, last night. You are so fired from being damage control.
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
you had sex with a 30 year old who doesn't have a cell phone but does have an 8 year old son.
he's 29.
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
He gave me his business card. It was a Justin Bieber trading card with his number written in sharpie. I have to call him don't I?
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
When I woke up today i said I will NOT sleep with her. This morning I did the walk of shame into work wearing the same clothes... How was your Monday?
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