There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
i take my contacts out every time we fuck so i cant see all the stretch marks
Just got a message from a guy on a dating site who says he helped me remove lime pulp from my eye in a club toilet 2 weeks ago.
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
Do you remember whose house we're in?
Never joke about your clitoris.
Randomize
